The Different Types of Fears (pt. 2)
Continued from Pt 1.
I’ve previously discussed, although it sounds off, how fear is not the enemy. We are now taking the conversation one step further. See, another misconception surrounding fear is that it is a one-shoe-fits-all feeling. We often think that we fear failure and that’s it. This isn’t entirely the case. You may have a fear of failing but there can be different tangents that you must delve into first before you can truly conquer the odds. Fear needs to be analyzed and understood before you can overcome it.
Essentially, there are different facets to fear. It can take different forms that ultimately serve the same purpose: keeping you too afraid to follow through with your dreams. Which fear is holding you back from following your passion and fully achieving your BIG goals? What scares you from taking a step forward towards your potential?
First and foremost, if this topic is something you’d like to really dive into at length, I actually discuss it much more thoroughly on my podcast Succeed Against The Odds. If you’d rather the extremely condensed version, I’ve compiled a list of potential tangent fears you may be neglecting.
Is it the fear of success?
I hear this one all the time and yet it still confuses me. If it is, ask yourself this question: if you were 100% sure that you would succeed, would you still be afraid? The answer is probably, no. This means that the fear of success is a ruse. It is not the fear of success but rather all the stops in between the present and the future. This is normal. Once you’ve had a little success, you will be expected to continue having new successes. This can be overwhelming at times but it is also worth it. Just as you got to the first level, you will definitely get to the next one.
Is it the fear of change? Of leaving your comfort zone?
This is a tough one for a lot of people but you have to remember that nothing exciting happens in the comfort zone. One thing I have personally learned in life is that you must push through and exit your comfort zone because it is holding you prisoner. Yes, fear can be comfortable. It may not be feel safe and good in the moment. However, that comfortability can also act as a shackle to your current life. You can never step forward and do something incredible if you are shackled behind your comfort. Trust me. The two cannot truly live harmoniously.
Is it fear of abandonment or rejection?
Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “do what you feel in your heart to be right for you'll be criticized anyway.” This quote changed my life. It is true that regardless of what you do and who you do it with, there will be someone out there who doesn’t agree. There will always be those who judge others. If people are going to judge you anyway, you might as well go for what you believe is right. Follow your gut, follow your dreams, not what someone else's expectation of you may be. Those who stick around are worth having around. Those who leave, well, they probably were not your true friends to begin with.
Or maybe it is a fear of being judged.
If you think you aren’t good enough, it’s time to stop telling yourself that lie. The truth of the matter is that no one has it all figured it out. No matter how far ahead of you others may be, they do not have it all figured out either. You are good enough to start and you will become better as you continue working on whatever it is you need to improve. Take it step by step, no one is a master when they first start out. Get out of your own head and just begin.
At the end of the day, you must truly unpack your thoughts and feelings. You must reflect on what it is that is holding you back. Yes, you don’t want to fail. However, perhaps there is something else going on. Perhaps you have a specific tangent fear that you are not addressing. Regardless of the case, remember this: if replace the word failure with “lesson” or “experience”, you will gain a whole new outlook on life.
Can you imagine if when you were a baby and learning to walk, you stopped when you first fell down? We are born resilient, we are meant to get back up.
So, which type of fear is holding you back?